Saturday, April 30, 2005

20:39:24/05.02.2005

some time in february, i was struck with a terrible illness with which i am still recuperating from. it came in the guise of a fever but i was hospitalized for a week and had to bedrest for a week more. and all my life i considered myself healthy. really healthy. i was involved in a lot of sports and cross training and never fell ill. i guess life has a way of proving you wrong. no matter, because due to my illness, i gained something more important. following is a thread of text messages sent to me by cy (have i ever told you that it sounds a lot like sigh?). anyway, i've decided to log it as a post since i am in fear of my phone being snatched or erasing important messages by mistake. i wouldn't want to lose anything memorable, even if it includes me in the hospital with needles piercing my skin.

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haaay... sori tawag ako. can't help it. sobrang dysfunctional labu without your presence.. what am i to do without my wify..
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for the longest time i have not felt this much sadness.. as i stare on one of your pics which i have set as my wallpaper i realize that i have taken for granted the happiness that you have brought me. all the simple things that we have done together bring me the utmost joy and sorrow at the same time, for remembering those moments remind me of my missing limb. i am but an empty vessel without you. this once warn and happy home has become gloomy in a matter of minutes. i hope i will i will not be dehydrated. for i have emptied bottles and bottles of tears. the thought of your illness and constant suffering will never leave me at ease. i know now more than ever that this person that you call your love will easily give anything and everything, for you to be well again.. it was once ridiculous for me to think that people are completed by their loved ones. now i can say with certainty that that statement is valid. i love you so much and i will die over and over again for you..
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just finished taking a bath and putting some oil.. this is the first time i put oil on my body.. not for my skin, but to envelope myself i your scent. ily.
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im glad that i'm feeling the way im feeling towards you. i know my love will not be put to waste.. i feel promiscuity to be beyond me.
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me too. im so glad i left L*** for you. im so glad i got accepted in canon. im so glad i knew enough about war3 to talk to you. as i said, at this point i feel like my life's a series of fortunate events.. knowing now that you were at the finish line puts me into this blissful place i could only describe as heaven.
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wify, will you marry me? in maybe 2 years? i love you. hope it's alright with your family.
[i said yes to this one... so my profile at friendster is now valid... yes, i am married (ok engaged for now.. XD) ]
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i will buy an engagement ring when i have the money. i love you. this statement will remain and not be limited to our lifetime but will perpetuate itself eternally. so long as men can breathe or eyes can see.
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i exist for you alone... im really glad i had the courage to leave my old life for you.
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i love you.. no. I LOVE YOU. love here is not just the ordinay word "love".. it's something that only the both of us can feel and understand.. it's something so special that i wouldn't dare associate it with the previous people in my life. you are the only one who will receive this love.